Stop reading, start eating

Happy belated Thanksgiving, o gentle readers! I celebrated this holiday (which the aforementioned Sarah Vowell reveals may have been a celebration of a Pequot massacre) by cooking a lot, lounging about, and bonking my dog on her head with her squeaky duck, which she thinks is the best thing next to canned whipped cream. I felt like roasting a wavy-legged bird was not something I was interested in this year, so instead I made my favorite Chicken Piccata recipe, from the BEST BLOG IN THE WORLD.

Ingredients:
6 boneless skinless chicken breasts (pounded to an even thickness)
2 tablespoons butter (for frying)
1 tablespoon oil (for frying)
Breading-
4 tablespoons of milk
2 large eggs
¾ cup flour
1 ½ teaspoons seasoning salt
1 teaspoon paprika
¾ teaspoon garlic powder
½ teaspoon ground black pepper
Sauce-
1 cup chicken broth
½ cup white wine
3 tablespoons lemon juice
1 tablespoon cornstarch
1 tablespoon garlic (minced)
1 onion (chopped)
½ lb fresh sliced mushrooms
4 tablespoons fresh parsley (chopped)

Step 1: Pound chicken breasts to an event thickness between two sheets of wax paper (if they are really thick cut them in half). In a shallow bowl or plate combine flour, paprika, seasoning salt, black pepper and garlic powder. Mix well.
Step 2: In another bowl beat eggs and milk together.
Step 3: Dip chicken first in the egg mixture and then roll in the flour mixture and coat thoroughly.
Step 4: To make the sauce- whisk together chicken broth, lemon juice, wine and cornstarch – set aside for now.
Step 5: Heat oil and butter in a large skillet over medium heat. Add the coated chicken breasts and sauté on both sides until golden brown but do not cooking completely. Remove chicken breasts from the pan.
Step 6: Add mushroom slices to the pan and sauté for 5 minutes. Add in garlic and onions and Sauté for 3 minutes. Pour the sauce mixture into the pan and simmer over medium heat.
Step 7: Add chicken breasts back into the pan. Reduce heat to medium low and simmer for 25 minutes or until fully cooked. Top with fresh parsley.

...Step 8: Go, "NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM!"

I also made horribly lumpy mashed potatoes, which were also thin and gummy? Somehow they ended up boiling in mashed form near their completion....but they still tasted sufficiently potatoey enough. The cranberry sauce was fine, the boxed mix stuffing was gummy too, and the peas were generally fine because it's hard to mess up a frozen vegetable you've been cooking your whole life. I also made two delicious pies, one apple and one pumpkin. All in all it was a good day. I'm glad that I celebrated helping the Indians by bringing them smallpox, plague and a smorgasboard of other death options with such a delicious meal!